A Complete Erotic Massage For Women
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A Simple Yoni Massage (for Women)
My wife and I have practiced Tantra/Sacred Sex for several
years and have received much joy from the techniques and processes. One of my
wife's favorite and frequently requested sexual activity is the Yoni Massage. It
has greatly expanded our sex life, brought us closer and has given me a greater
appreciation of women. We've taught the technique to many of our friends and
they too have enjoyed good results from it. I offer it here and hope it enhances
your sex life. Enjoy.
BACKGROUND INFO:
Yoni (pronounced YO-NEE) is a Sanskrit word for the vagina
that is loosely translated as "Sacred Space" or "Sacred Temple." Its meaning and
use is an alternate perspective from the Western view of the female genitals
(i.e., Pussy, Cunt, Twat, etc., words which may or may not be complimentary
depending on the intent of their usage). In Tantra, the Yoni is seen from a
perspective of love and respect. This is especially helpful for men to learn.
The purpose of the Yoni Massage is to create a space for
the woman (the receiver) to relax, and enter a state of high arousal and
experience much pleasure from her Yoni. Her partner (the giver) experiences the
joy of being of service and witnessing a special moment. The Yoni Massage can
also be used as a form of safer sex (when latex gloves are used) and is an
excellent activity to build trust and intimacy. Some massage and sex therapists
use it to assist women to break through sexual blocks or trauma.
The goal of the Yoni massage is not orgasm. Orgasm is often
a pleasant and welcome side effect. The goal is simply to pleasure and massage
the Yoni/vagina. From this perspective both receiver and giver can relax, and
not have to worry about achieving something. When orgasm does occur it is
usually more expanded, more intense and more satisfying. Orgasm is allowed to
happen or not happen.
It is also helpful for the giver to not expect anything in
return. Just allow the receiver to enjoy the massage and to relax into herself
afterwards. Of course, other sexual activity may follow but it should be
entirely the receiver's choice. This perspective will build greater intimacy and
trust, and will greatly expand your sexual horizons.
PREPARATION:
Bathing is always helpful as it relaxes both the receiver
and giver. A quiet space is desirable with pleasing
music, candles, pillows, etc., or whatever makes the participants relax and
feel safe. Allow yourself enough time and do not hurry through the process.
Go to the bathroom before beginning the massage. The best
results will occur when the bowels and bladder are empty and you will avoid the
unnecessary experience of interrupting the massage to go to the bathroom.
Connect with your partner by hugging, holding, eye gazing
(looking into each other's eyes for an extended time), or whatever brings you to
a place of safety and relaxation.
PROCEDURE:
Have the receiver lie on her back with pillows under her
head so she can look down at her genitals and up at her partner (giver). Place a
pillow, covered with a towel, under her hips. Her legs are to be spread apart
with the knees slightly bent (pillows or cushions under the knees will also
help) and her genitals clearly exposed for the massage.
The giver sits cross-legged between the receivers' legs.
The giver may wish to sit on a pillow or cushion. This position allows full
access to the Yoni and other parts of the body.
Before contacting the body, begin with deep, relaxed
breathing. Both giver and receiver should remember to keep breathing deeply,
slowly and with relaxation during the entire process. The giver will gently
remind the receiver to start breathing again if the receiver stops or takes
shallower breaths. Deep breathing, not hyperventilating, is very important here.
Gently massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, breasts, etc., to
get the receiver to relax and for the giver to prepare for touching the Yoni.
Pour a small quantity of a high-quality oil or lubricant on
the mound of the Yoni. Pour just enough so that it drips down the outer lips and
covers the outside of the Yoni. (Several excellent sexual lubricants are
available for this. Many lingerie shops, sex toy shops, sex magazines, etc.,
offer these safe lubricants.)
CAVEAT - Do not mix oil-based products with latex.
Begin gently massaging the mound and outer lips of the
Yoni. Spend some time here and do not rush. Relax and enjoy giving the massage.
Gently squeeze the outer lip between the thumb and index finger, and slide up
and down the entire length of each lip. Do the same thing to the inner lips of
the Yoni/vagina. Take your time.
The receiver can massage her own breasts or may just relax
and continue breathing deeply. It is helpful for giver and receiver to look into
each other's eyes as much as possible. The receiver can tell the giver if the
pressure, speed, depth, etc., needs to be increased or decreased. Limit your
speaking and focus on the pleasurable sensations. (It is my experience that too
much talking gets one out of their feelings and diminishes the effects.)
Gently stroke the clitoris with clockwise and
counter-clockwise circles. Gently squeeze it between thumb and index fingers. Do
this as a massage and not to get the receiver off. The receiver will undoubtedly
become very aroused but continue to encourage her to just relax and breathe.
Slowly and with great care, insert the middle finger of
your right hand into the Yoni (there is a reason for using the right hand as
opposed to the left. It has to do with polarity in Tantra). Very gently explore
and massage the inside of the Yoni/ vagina with this finger. Take your time, be
gentle, and feel up, down and sideways. Vary the depth, speed and pressure.
Remember, this is a massage and you're nurturing and relaxing the Yoni.
With your palm facing up, and the middle finger inside the
Yoni, move the middle finger in a "come here" gesture or crook back towards the
palm. You will contact a spongy area of tissue just under the pubic bone, behind
the clitoris. This is the G-spot or in Tantra, the sacred spot (there are many
excellent books that go into detail about this area). Your partner may feel as
if they have to urinate or it may be painful or pleasurable. Again vary the
pressure, speed and pattern of movement. You can move side to side, back and
forth, or in circles with your middle finger. You can also insert the finger
that's between your middle finger and pinkie. Check with your partner first
before sticking two fingers into them. Most women should have no problem and
will enjoy the increased stimulation from two fingers. Take your time and be
very gentle. You may use the thumb of the right hand to stimulate the clitoris
as well.
An option to try if the receiver wants it is to insert the
pinkie of the right hand into her anus. Ask her first and do not insert your
pinkie into her Yoni/vagina after it has been in her anus. Use lubrication and
be very gentle.
(In Tantra, it is said that when your pinkie is in her
anus, the next finger and middle finger in her Yoni/vagina, and your thumb on
her clitoris, "You are holding one of the mysteries of the universe in your
hand.")
So, what is your left hand doing all this time? You can use
it to massage the breasts, abdomen, or clitoris. If you massage the clitoris
it's usually best to use your thumb in an up down motion, with the rest of your
hand resting on and massaging the mound. The dual stimulation of right and left
hands will provide much pleasure for the receiver. I do not recommend using your
left hand to touch your own genitals because it may take your focus off the
receiver. Remember, this massage is for her pleasure and much of the benefit
comes from not only the physical stimulation but the intent as well.
Continue massaging, trying different speeds, pressures and
motions. Keep breathing and looking into each other's eyes. She may have
powerful emotions come up and may cry. Just keep breathing and be gentle. Many
women have been sexually abused and need to be healed. A giving, loving and
patient partner can be of great value to her.
If she has an orgasm, keep her breathing, and continue
massaging if she wants. More orgasms may occur, each gaining in intensity. In
Tantra this is called "riding the wave." Many women can learn how to be
multi-orgasmic with the Yoni Massage and a very patient partner.
Keep massaging until she tells you to stop. Very slowly,
gently, and with respect, remove your hands. Allow her to just lay there and
enjoy the afterglow of the Yoni massage. Cuddling or holding is very soothing as
well. As you learn to master the Yoni Massage your sex life will be greatly
enriched and you will learn a great deal about feminine sexuality.
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